Getting to Yes

LeadingStrategic LeadershipEmployee Performance and Talent Development

Apr 5

Written By Socrates - Head of School Team

Think you might want to read this book?

Have you ever been involved in a negotiation or disagreement and been frustrated by the resolution process or outcome? If so, Fisher, Ury, and Patton have the solution for next time in Getting to Yes. The reader will learn why stating interests rather than positions is key, why where you sit matters, and why acknowledging the worth of the other party are all keys to success. This is a great read for anyone looking to maximize their leadership potential.

What Would Socrates Ask?

When entering tense conversations, are you looking to win, or come out with the most agreeable position possible?
What if we acknowledge the emotions surrounding an issue before we problem solve?
What if I always separated the people from the problem?
Is receiving a “no” sometimes a win in negotiating?

Concepts

Four major obstacles that inhibit the inventing of an abundance of options are as follows: (1) Premature judgement, (2) Searching for the single answer, (3) The assumption of a fixed pie, and (4) Thinking that “solving their problem is their problem.” To overcome these constraints, you must understand them.
When more attention is given to positions, less attention is devoted to meeting the underlying concerns of the parties.
Principled Negotiation can be divided into three stages: analysis, planning, and discussion.
Interests motivate people— they are the silent movers behind the hubbub of positions. Your position is something you decide upon, and your interests are what contribute to your decision.
Acknowledge basic human needs in a negotiation: security, economic well-being, a sense of belonging, recognition, and control over one’s life.
One way to dovetail interests is to invent several options all equally acceptable to you and ask the other side which one they prefer. You want to know what is preferable, not necessarily what is acceptable.
BATNA- Best Alternative To a Negotiated Agreement.

Quotes from the author

The ability to see the situation as the other side sees it, as difficult as it may be, is one of the most important skills a negotiator can possess.
Any method of negotiation may be fairly judged by three criteria: (1) It should produce a wise agreement if agreement is possible, (2) It should be efficient, and (3) It should improve or at least not damage the relationship between the parties.
Statements generate resistance, whereas questions generate answers.
Silence is one of your best weapons— use it. If they have made an unreasonable proposal or an attack, you regard it as unjustified. The best thing to do may be to sit there and not say a word.
The method of principled negotiation developed at the Harvard Negotiation Project is to decide issues on their merits rather than through a haggling process focused on what each side says it will and won’t do.
Whatever else you are doing at any point during a negotiation, from preparation to follow-up, it is worth asking yourself, “Am I paying enough attention to the people problem?”
A major consequence of the “people problem” in negotiation is that the parties’ relationship tends to become entangled with their discussions of substance. On both the giving and receiving end, we are likely to treat the people and the problem as one.
To find your way through the jungle of people problems, it is useful to think in terms of three basic categories: perception, emotion, and communication. The various people problems all fall into one of these three baskets.
Don’t react to emotional outbursts. Releasing emotions can prove risky if it leads to an emotional reaction. If not controlled, it can result in a violent quarrel.
Show that you understand them— “Let me see whether I follow what you are telling me” or “from your point of view, the situation looks like this…”
No matter how many people are involved in a negotiation, important decisions are typically made when no more than two people are in the room.
Benjamin Franklin’s favorite technique was to ask an adversary if he could borrow a certain book. This would flatter the person, as well as give them the comfortable feeling of knowing that Franklin owed them a favor.
Separating the people from the problem is not something you can do once and forget about; you have to keep working at it. The basic approach is to deal with the people as human beings and with the problem on its merits.
When you do look behind opposed positions for the motivating interests, you can often find an alternative position that meets not only your interests, but theirs as well.
Be hard on the problem, soft on the people.
What is your BATNA— Your Best Alternative To a Negotiated Agreement? That is the standard against which any proposed agreement should be measured.
You yourself can concentrate on the merits, rather than the positions.
When the other side sets forth their position, neither reject it nor accept it. Treat it as one possible option. Look for the interest behind it, seek out the principles that it reflects, and think about ways to improve it.